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I spork alone... with nobody else...

Apr. 26th, 2006 | 10:58 am
location: undisclosed location so that the author can't track me down and speak to me in horrendous english
mood: cranky cranky
music: YSI'd music cause my flist loves me
posted by: wook77 in hp_splodey

This week's victim honoree of the Golden Spork will receive a true honor. She/he/it will be sporked by yours truly. Alone. By myself.

Why, you might ask? Because wildegirl_05 is one lucky bint that got to go to Paris and left me here all by my lonesome to spork.

So, I have to admit that this week's choice came to me almost as if it were destiny. I refreshed a certain website's "Recently Added" page and God spoke to me and said… "Here! Here is your victim honoree!

This was truly heavenly to spork. Literally, from the "information" page through to the end of Chapter 4, I had so much material that I had to cut it. I'm actually kind of glad that wilde wasn't here as she would have only cluttered up my greatness. Ok, maybe not. (after reading through, I'm not nearly as funny without wilde here to egg me on)

We start with the summary and warnings…Collapse )

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Going to hell in a sporkbasket -

Apr. 14th, 2006 | 04:06 pm
location: hell
mood: sporktastic sporktastic
posted by: wook77 in hp_splodey

So much to spork, so little time.

Before we get to the sporking, to show you how committed we are to sporking, wildegirl_05 sent me the following message -

wildegirl_05: omg, the sporking got to me and i was typing up an email and instead of split i wrote shitemail.
wook77:did you spork yourself?
wildegirl_05: I did just by telling you now.

Sporking has now intruded into our daily lives... just to bring entertainment to you. Do you appreciate it?

To clarify - The conversations below reflect actual IM conversations between wilde and wook while reading the victim honoree. The maroon text is actual quotations and excerpts of the story. And no, we won't tell you where we found it, who's the author or what story it is.

This week's victim honoree had an amazing story, especially considering (and I quote) "Author's Notes: this is my third fic I'm amaze that I have that much brain to make another fic. This is my first sex story. So I'm sorry if it isn't that good. What do you expect from a virgin anyway? I also don't write that much Dominant Harry/Submissive Draco fics. Please read then review and tell me what you think. If the sex really sucks... then I won't write anymore sex fics in the future. So tell me what you really think. On with the [sporking]."

Her wish is my command...

On with the sporkingCollapse )

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Our First Sporking (aka Part 2 of a Sporking in Two Parts)

Apr. 6th, 2006 | 04:55 pm
mood: cranky cranky
music: splodey
posted by: wook77 in hp_splodey

the sporking continues...Collapse )

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our first sporking (aka A Sporking in Two Parts)

Apr. 6th, 2006 | 04:54 pm
mood: cranky cranky
music: splodey
posted by: wook77 in hp_splodey

Our First Sporking. I feel a tear come to my eye as I think about it.

The first victim honoree is a creature feature. We have not 1 but 2 new creatures. Your first guesses as to who are these new creatures? Nope, not Snape. Not Hermione. Not Lucius. Come on people, work with me here.

Of course it's Harry and Draco. Harry is an "Erinyes" and Draco is a "Nyx".

Where we have pretentious chapter titles, Hugh Hefner dreams and a gadzillion types of mist...Collapse )

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Apr. 5th, 2006 | 10:43 am
posted by: wook77 in hp_splodey

Welcome to hp_splodey. We spork because we love.

No, seriously. We ignore the bad fic. Some of it is just plain bad. Some of it is so bad, it's genius.

Those deserve the honor of sporking.

Help us out - have a story you'd like to see sporked? Please leave a comment including the link and story summary.

Please note that at this time, we will only spork H/D stories. This is because wook77 doesn't like Ron or Snape with working willies while wildegirl_05 refuses to read other pairings.

Finally - we're in need of icons. Would anyone be willing to make a few for us? We'll promise not to spork you...for awhile...

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